Coming Soon: Deployment #2

The USS Enterprise has been back from their most recent deployment for seven months, but it seems as though they just arrived last week. I met a wonderful friend that day waiting for her sailor to exit the hangar bay just as I was. The atmosphere at the homecoming ceremony was full of patriotism, thankfulness, and love. I have never experienced anything greater in my life.

In a few short weeks, the ship goes back out for their final deployment before the ship is decommissioned. The past seven months have flown by faster than I can blink, and I have found myself to be more emotional than ever. The thought of not having him to talk to every day is scaring me worse than last time.

One week from today, I will be on my way to Virginia for our last visit before we say "See you later." Of course I am ecstatic to see him, but I can not help but dread it at the same time. For each day that I am there, we will be one day closer to another huge challenge on our relationship.

There are way too many negative things about deployment to count, so that's why I am trying to look at this on a much brighter note.
1. For every day that passes while I'm there, that is one day closer to the end of the deployment.
2. The seven months in between these two deployments flew by, but seven months after our second, I will be moving in with him.
3. Even though we will not be able to talk every day, I know that we will be thinking about each other, and that's enough for me.
4. The best aspect of deployment: I get to experience another homecoming. The feeling of holding him after so long is completely indescribable.

I will not deny that for the next several months my blogs may not be very cheerful, but I am confident in myself and our relationship that we will kick deployment's ass!
P.S. Zach is the 6th one from the left in this picture.

Remember What You Love, and Love What You Remember

Chick Flicks usually aren't my thing. Most of the time, I would so much rather see a slasher, or a good Denzel action film than a movie with a soundtrack full of Taylor Swift songs. 

When I first saw previews for The Vow, it felt like a girly wave drowned me. Along with 99% of the girls on this planet, I felt like the world would end if I could not see that movie. I just got back from the movie theater (my friend and I saw the midnight premier). Before I opened my laptop to write, all I could think about was what my life would be like if I was in Rachel McAdams's shoes. I promise, for those of you that have not seen the movie yet, there is no need for a spoiler alert in the remaining text.

Would I be able to fall in love with someone who seems like a stranger all over again?

Well then I got to thinking, I kind of already do that every time I see Zach. Of course, he is no stranger to me, but it seems like it sometimes... especially after deployment. Whenever I finally see him after months of being apart, I fall in love all over again. Being with him in person is nothing like our usual routine of entertaining ourselves through a phone. The facial expressions, the way he holds me, and the way he gently slides the hair away from my face when he leans in for a kiss are three of the very many reasons I fell in love with him. Those things cannot be experienced over the phone. No, I'm not meeting a new person every few months. I am simply recalling the actions that took my breath away years ago, before we ever knew what a long distance relationship was. 

I guess the whole point of this entry was that it is not impossible to remember what you love, and love what you remember. Trust me, I do it all the time.

And Then There Are Those Nights...

What I mean by those nights: 

When you don't want to do anything. 

You don't even want to look at your phone or be social.

The idea of going out seems like torture.

Every song you listen to stirs up another emotion.

Thinking about seeing your sailor is too painful.

You aren't satisfied with anything at all.

Tonight would be one of those nights for me. Perfect inspiration for a blog. 

No, Aunt Flow is NOT here on her monthly visit. I knew what you were thinking...

I was having a really good day earlier  visiting my dad and step mom at home from school. We were all laughing and joking around. Ever since the sun started to go down though, I have felt so...blah.
Facebook and Pinterest were keeping my attention for a little while, but then I got bored with that so I had to find something else to do. I decided to complain.

I get this feeling quite a bit, as do you I'm sure. Usually it's when I have not heard from Zach in a few days. He is the best at calming me down by making me laugh. I will share some things he says with you that don't work, and some that work when I feel like this... and what goes through my head when he says it.

Things Zach tells me when I feel "blah" (that don't work) : 

 - "Just relax." OR "Chill out babygirl." This definitely does not work because if I'm upset about something, it's  a pretty big deal. Too big of a deal to just simply relax or chill out. Don't men know anything?

- "Everything is going to be okay. Just don't think about it so much." AHH! If everything is going to be okay, then why in the hell am I bawling my eyes out?! Nothing will be okay. And if I can't think about it, then how am I going to be able to talk about it with you?!

- "What's wrong babygirl?" (What every woman says with sad eyes) Nothing...

- "Are you sure?" (Also what every woman says) Yeah, I'm sure......10 second pause...... Welllll I guess...

- "You must be on your period." What makes you think that? I still act like the same person when I'm on it. What's that even supposed to mean anyway? (His responses are never the correct thing to say)  

Things Zach tells me when I feel "blah" (that do work) :

- "You know you can always talk to me, right?" Awwwwh yes I do baby. Do you really want to know what's bothering me? "Of course babygirl." 

- "I love you, and I will always be here for you. Especially when you feel like this." I love you too, and thank you so much. I could not have gotten any luckier. No one would put up with my B.S. the way that you do.

- "Everything will be so much easier for the both of us when we can finally start our lives living together." I dream about that day all the time.

- "Am I gonna have to beat someone's ass today?" It cracks me up every time he says this, haha! All I do is just laugh like crazy. 

Anyway, I think writing this post has helped me out a little bit. Nothing says strong than being able to make yourself smile in rough times!

Thank you for reading. Hope you enjoyed it (:

The Wonders Skype Can Do

We aren't virgins to the Skype world, by any means, but tonight was the first time that we have done it since he has been in the Navy. Phone calls are great, emails are good, but Skyping is the cat's meow, man!
I absolutely love being able to see him smile. Skype actually lets me see the dumb face he makes when he yawns so I can pick on him about it to no end.

It's the closest thing I can get to actually being there with him. 

I have a roommate who is constantly talking about how she never gets to see her boyfriend. He goes to the same exact university, and lives about a mile away. He comes over every other day. She never shuts up about it either, and maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I think she talks about it in front of me on purpose.

Fact is: 

You know you don't get to see your boyfriend enough when you kiss your laptop camera during Skype.

You know you don't get to see your boyfriend enough when your day is so much brighter just because of a short email or a minute-long phone call.

and

You know you don't get to see your boyfriend enough when you have come to grips that technology is the entire basis of your relationship.

Dear Inventor of Skype,

Thank you so much for inventing this wonderful thing that has helped millions of people across the world stay in touch with their loved ones.